that guy on the titanic

In the past week ive had, and continue to have, a completely harrowing time. Workwise anyways (though considering the hours, my life has only been work!!)..ok!.. ok!.. i can literally sense people saying "whats so great bout that?" "stop complaining" blah blah (once again, i don't have voices in my head)...so moving on...like i was saying, in this time, even though ive barely had a free moment (no im not saying how hard i work, again, believe me this is going somewhere), ive caught myself wondering, on more than one occasion, about our survival instincts...Man's (and i dont mean "man" but humans) way of coping with the urban jungle, of dealing with hassles and basically stress!!

We all go through a mess of things all day everyday...petrol pump guy tries to rip you off, parking's full, supplier's promise you the solar system and all the planets and stars in it but show up with one lump of coal which, and you know this is true, they will insist is the natural evolutionary product of all they promised!! deadlines will always be due 24 hours ago! and the printer and all connected will not function when you need that report...oh sureee it'll work when you want the guitar chords to "someday" but never when you need it. .. night brings with it a whole new menu of pain...you go out with a bunch of friends...ther is no going out in delhi...atleast not since places shut at 12!!! so you loiter around till you give up and go home...i wish i had more exciting issues but they'll have to do for now... I guess im stepping into Murphy's law territory here..

now that Murphy's law has come up, i must say that i am eternally optimistic by nature so ive always found the collective laws amusing, sometimes coincidentally accurate, but by and large-not true..after all, if everything is gonna go wrong, why do anything?! right? But this time around, and ive seen it in work atleast, everything HAS gone wrong...which again, strangely, didnt make me think about Murphy's law, but rather, about stress and how to deal with it??

Why i thought about that, is because while everything around me seems to be breaking down, i have been able to sleep at night, chat with friends, WRITE THIS POST, sing and whistle aimlessly, and i mean aimlessly, and do pretty much all that an average HASSLE-FREE guy does. Even while im running around from one dept. to another, im whistling or singing or humming!! what is wrong with me?? It's not like i dont care for the work (i do-intensly. otherwise i wouldnt do it at all) then why? and then.......... it hit me. That is my survival mechanism /instinct. I do (atleast subconciously and effortlessly) anything that keeps me disconnected enough from the problems of life...and for some reason, the movie-titanic popped in... is that what the violin players were doing on the titanic as it slipped into the sea? No ofcourse not, they were playing tunes to give the dieing (themselves included) some solace and i, in no way think myslef to be achieving any such noble goal..infact, i would probably be the singing, whistling idiot sitting around behind the players looking at all the people slide by!! but think about it...is being sufficiently detached, the best way to really take in reality?? ok ok sorry didnt wanna go for a "does that blow your mind?" moment...but seriously, the realisation of subconcious, almost involuntary, behaviour in trying situations makes you question all people's behaviour in general...did your girlfriend / boyfriend just shout at you cos he/she's a pain, or is that how they keep people at a distance (survival for some)..or did the supplier (stupid freakish cretins..die and burn in hell) give you a bogus target cos they're lyeing cheating bastards and that's what they do or did the guy have aishwarya rai dancing in kajra re while talking to you??!! eitherways, i feel that ever since i thought about this, ive become aware of the larger forces at work. I mean, if everyone has an embedded mechanism, then i can assume that all the people (all the people i care about anyways!!) will be alright..that everyone will survive this madness that we go through everyday.

damn! really thought i was on to something here...bottom line, i'm not an alien (or atleast that's what i would say if i wanted you to believe that i was'nt an alien).

would love inputs on the instinct thing..not me being an alien (cos im not)