To Be

To be fluid. To be poured from a bottle and to lose all sense of shape or form, only to be molded by the next empty vessel. Or to flow down a mountain swallowing rocks and life and mud and move on tirelessly till you stretch out endlessly across the face of the earth. To mix in with anything, to be mixed, be influenced and influence. Let something drop inside you and be lost in you, to change with you. If only I could be splashed out on the ground and left to permeate, to seep, to sink, to absorb and be absorbed. To not feel anything, but be part of everything. No more thoughts, dreams, aspirations, stress, worry, guilt, happiness, shame, pride, love, fear, joy or anger. No thinking about the next day, but being part of it. Being it. Enter in a body, fill it, saturate it. And when you can go no further, take flight. Evaporate. Swirl around in the air. Be taken in in a breathe. Fly, infect. Be the air and float away.

To be the sand. To be small yet strong and complete. To need nothing. To be nothing. To have no need to be anywhere and yet feel fulfilled. If only I could break into a billion particles and yet feel whole. To be real and hard and solid and yet ride away on the wind.

To lay still. To have no action. Motionless. To not think about where this is going, where one has to be, who I am, where to go, why am I here, when will it work, when will it stop, why do this, who are they, when will it, and why?

If only for now, if only for a moment, but just be.